Shopping with Morgana
by rubberglue
Summary: Morgana drags Arthur shopping. He is not amused. A/G.


_AN: A quick and (literally) dirty AG fic. :) And yeah, I'm still working on Secrets and Kings and Queens. Except, I happily went off to sign up for the merlin reverse bb so I've a fic that is due in March. So. Many many apologies for the long wait and thank you for all the lovely reviews._

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Arthur stares up at the shop sign. Pink Passion. He doesn't need to look. He can feel Morgana smirking next to him.

"No."

"You promised Arthur. And you don't break your promises, do you?"

Other people have loving siblings. They have siblings who care for them, who show their love in societally acceptable ways. Take Elyan for example. Elyan has a great sister. Guinevere is kind, caring, smart, strong and gorgeous. He'd seen her tend to Elyan when he'd fractured his arm in a match, all care, concern and competence.

He on the other hand has Morgana. Morgana who laughed and texted all her friends when he tripped and fell in their kitchen and ended up with a twisted ankle. There was no fussing or words of concern for him. Just his loving sister snapping photos of him on the kitchen floor.

Not that he wants Guinevere as his sister because that would mean all the dreams he'd been having recently taking a very creepy turn.

"Are you thinking of Gwen again? Because if you don't go in with me, I'm going to tell her you were standing outside Pink Passion thinking of her."

He feels his cheeks heat. "I am not. I'm thinking about why I'm saddled with you as my sister."

"Oh please. It's written all over your face. I know how you feel about her so stop trying to fool me. Come on."

"I am not going into a sex shop with my sister!"

Morgana turns to him. "Do you really want to create a scene here? You said you'd come shopping with me." Her fingers curl into his arm and Arthur can feel her nails pressing lightly into his skin. He sighs audibly then lets Morgana drag him to the door.

The shop is surprisingly cheery, full of bright colours. Arthur's curiosity gets the better of him and he looks at the various displays. Some he understands - lingerie, vibrators and dildos. Some he tries very hard to not stare at - what looks like a swing, something else that appears to be a wheel of tongues.

"Ms Pendragon!" A saleslady waltzes out from behind the counter, all smiles and takes Morgana's hands, kissing her on the cheek as if they are long lost friends. Arthur makes a note never to enter Morgana's room without giving fair warning. "And is this your partner?"

"No!" Arthur says immediately, taking a step back to put some distance between him and Morgana.

Morgana merely laughs and pats him on the cheek. "He's my little brother. I'm opening him up to new experiences." Her voice drops to a whisper. "He's very innocent. That's what happens when -"

Knowing there's no point in even trying to defend himself, Arthur closes his eyes and prays that this whole thing is a dream. Unfortunately, opening his eyes tells him otherwise. He tunes out Morgana's voice, a skill he's honed to perfection over the past twenty years or so.

He turns around and there's a display of edible massage oil. Strawberry. Chocolate. Orange. Picking one up, Arthur reads the suggestions on the back of the box. When his mind conjures up immediately images of his hands on Guinevere's back, smoothing over her skin before he leans closer to kiss that dip between her waist and her bum, he drops the bottle, almost toppling the display as he backs away.

Right into Morgana, who is predictably smirking at him. "See something you like?"

"No. Are you done?"

The smirk gets larger. "Oh Celeste here is about to show me some new stock." Her arm slips into his. "I would love your opinion, Arthur."

"You never want my opinion. Let's not start now."

Morgana only laughs before leading him to where Celeste is standing, a wide smile on her face. In her hands is what looks like mascara. Except it's not.

"The bristles of the brush here will stimulate -"

Arthur looks up at the ceiling. Then at the floor, noting the scratches on his shoes. He hums the latest One Direction song - the song that has been plaguing him since Merlin decided they were the best thing since sliced bread.

"So Arthur." The pinch on his arm is discrete, a word he cannot use to describe the array of vibrators in front of him. "Which one do you think I should get?"

Hoping to hasten the experience, Arthur randomly points at a particularly garish looking vibrator. "That looks good."

"Hmm. Neon green isn't actually Gwen's colour -"

"Guinevere?!" he splutters, desperately pushing out the sudden image of her on his bed, pleasuring herself.

"It's her birthday next week. I want to buy her a present," Morgana says matter of factly, as if they are in a jewelry store looking at earrings. "As I said -"

"I am not choosing a vibrator for Guinevere." The images are still at the edges of his mind, struggling to break free. He hums One Way or Another again, thinking of the utterly ridiculous music video Merlin made him watch. At least he tries.

Morgana stares at him. "Are you humming?"

"I am not! And I am not choosing Guinevere a gift from here."

Rolling her eyes, Morgana snaps. "Don't be a baby. Now which do you think she'll like. I'm partial to that one - it's silent and rechargeable."

Celeste nods eagerly. "That one is very popular. I actually have one and I can tell you that it's really good. The various speeds are give you such different experiences. Maybe you just want a quick orgasm, then this setting will get you to that point -"

Arthur coughs, shifting around hoping to ease the pressure that has built in his crotch area.

Celeste's eyes dart to him and completely misunderstands his cough. "It's very popular with my boyfriend as well." Her smile widens. "He loves it when I use it on him, dragging it up his penis."

He cannot take it anymore. Grabbing the vibrator, he nods. "We'll take it."

"How about some lingerie?"

"Oh brilliant idea Celeste," Morgana says. "Come on. I'm sure Guinevere would like some of these pretty lingerie."

Celeste scurries over to the lingerie section and pulls off some of them. "Does your friend prefer lace or leather?"

"Arthur?" Morgana asks pleasantly. "What do you think?"

"I think I hate you," he chokes out, again trying desperately stop the influx of images of Guinevere in lingerie. "I'm leaving."

He hears Morgana laugh and he knows she's probably casting aspersions on him. With one last scowl at Morgana, he marches out of the shop, grumbling under his breath. His mind full of ways to get his revenge, Arthur fails to notice someone walking towards him.

They slam into each other. Instinctively, he reaches out to grab the other person.

"Guinevere!"

"Arthur!" Under his hands, he can feel the soft smoothness of her skin, sending heat straight to his groin. All the images that had been plaguing him in the shop flutter in his mind again. "Did you just come from Pink Passion?"

There's humour in her voice and she doesn't move out of his hold. "Maybe," he mutters. "I was forced there, I'll have you know. Ordinarily I wouldn't be in such a place. And definitely I wouldn't be thinking of you in -"

He can feel the puff of her breath against his neck when she laughs quietly. His face is burning and he looks around for an escape. "It doesn't look like you bought anything," she says, her voice huskier than usual.

His hands are still on her bare shoulders, and his thumbs are moving in circles, enjoying the feel of her skin under him. He feels her shiver under his touch but she still doesn't move away. "Are you going in?" he asks.

"Morgana wanted me to meet her there, so I guess so. Guess you are Morgana's chauffeur today?"

He nods. She smiles. For a long moment, they stand like that - his hands cupping her shoulders. Her lips part and she exhales slowly. A faint blush colours her cheeks.

"I might do a little shopping since I'm here," she says quietly. Arthur's jeans get tight again. "Maybe you'd want to come over later and see what I got." She looks away, then bites her lips.

Rubbing his thumb across her lower lip, he nods again, wondering if he was still in the shop, dreaming this.

Guinevere takes a step back and his arms drop. "So I'll call you?"

"Yeah," he manages and as he watches her walk into the shop, he leans against his car and lets all the images he'd been trying to keep at bay play out in his mind. Perhaps the shopping trip hasn't been completely horrible.


End file.
